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Internet Federal Law
Hi. This is internet federal law. Feel free to add content as needed, because this is the internet and the people set the rules. DO NOT MODIFY EXISTING ARTICLES, ONLY ADD NEW ONES. EDITING EXISTING ONES WARRANTS AN INSTANT BAN. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED. I HOPE YOU UNDERSTAND. DON'T UNDERESTIMATE THIS THREAT. SERIOUSLY. Internet Federal Law 'Article 1' Article 1.1: '''4chan is twisted. '''Article 1.2: ''No, seriously. Don't go there.'' 'Article 2' Article 2.1: "They're", "their", "there", "two", "to", "too", "you're" and "your" will inevitably ''be misspelled. Accept it. '''Article 2.2: '''Your a grammer nazi if your triggered by this. 'Article 3' '''Article 3.1: '''The Oxford comma is a lie. 'Article 6' '''Article 6.1: '''The Internet hivemind can be a horrible, senseless, uncaring monster. 'Article 7' '''Article 7.1: '''No matter how much you love debating, keep in mind that no one on the internet debates. Instead they mock your intelligence as well as your parents. '''Article 7.2: '''There will come a point where you will be called a nazi. 'Article 8' '''Article 8.1: '''No man may think in a different way than that of the majority. '''Article 8.2: '''No redditor may think in a different way than that of the majority without being downvoted to hell. '''Article 8.3: '''No redditor may refuse to say "thanks for the gold, kind stranger" when gilded. '''Article 8.4: '''If the instructions were unclear, no man may refuse to specify what were the consequences of the misunderstanding. '''Article 8.5: '''No comment containing only the word "understandable" may be left without a reply saying "have a nice day". '''Article 8.6: '''No one may think that the Half-Life HD Models are good. '''Article 8.7: '''Everyone hated Terminator 3. '''Article 8.8: '''Xen sucks. 'Article 9' '''Article 9.1: '''The GIF pronunciation debate is unsolvable. It's the principle of the thing. 'Article 10' '''Article 10.1': Anyone who understands binary is a genius computer scientist. Article 10.2: 'Anyone who understands the Pythagorean theorem is above average. 'Article 11 Article 11.1: 'L I N K T A X 'Article 12 Article 12.1: 'Anything you say can and will be used against you. '''Article 12.2: '''Anything you say can and will be turned into something else. '''Article 12.3: '''You are linked to the alt-right. We know because you said so.'' '''Article 13 Article 13.1: ' - 1 - Member States shall provide that an online content sharing service provider performs an act of communication to the public or an act of making available to the public for the purposes of this Directive when it gives the public access to copyright protected works or other protected subject matter uploaded by its users. An online content sharing service provider shall therefore obtain an authorisation from the rightholders referred to in Article 3(1) and (2) of Directive 2001/29/EC, for instance by concluding a licensing agreement, in order to communicate or make available to the public works or other subject matter. - 2 - Member States shall provide that, where an online content-sharing service provider obtains an authorisation, for instance by concluding a licensing agreement, that authorisation shall also cover acts carried out by users of the services falling within the scope of Article 3 of Directive 2001/29/EC when they are not acting on a commercial basis or where their activity does not generate significant revenues. - 3 - When an online content-sharing service provider performs an act of communication to the public or an act of making available to the public under the conditions laid down in this Directive, the limitation of liability established in Article 14(1) of Directive 2000/31/EC shall not apply to the situations covered by this Article. The first subparagraph of this paragraph shall not affect the possible application of Article 14(1) of Directive 2000/31/EC to those service providers for purposes falling outside the scope of this Directive. - 4 - If no authorisation is granted, online content-sharing service providers shall be liable for unauthorised acts of communication to the public, including making available to the public, of copyright-protected works and other subject matter, unless the service providers demonstrate that they have: (a) made best efforts to obtain an authorisation, and (b) made, in accordance with high industry standards of professional diligence, best efforts to ensure the unavailability of specific works and other subject matter for which the rightholders have provided the service providers with the relevant and necessary information; and in any event © acted expeditiously, upon receiving a sufficiently substantiated notice from the rightholders, to disable access to, or to remove from, their websites the notified works or other subject matter, and made best efforts to prevent their future uploads in accordance with point (b). - 5 - In determining whether the service provider has complied with its obligations under paragraph 4, and in light of the principle of proportionality, the following elements, among others, shall be taken into account: (a) the type, the audience and the size of the service and the type of works or other subject matter uploaded by the users of the service; and (b) the availability of suitable and effective means and their cost for service providers. - 6 - Member States shall provide that, in respect of new online content-sharing service providers the services of which have been available to the public in the Union for less than three years and which have an annual turnover below EUR 10 million, calculated in accordance with Commission Recommendation 2003/361/EC20, the conditions under the liability regime set out in paragraph 4 are limited to compliance with point (a) of paragraph 4 and to acting expeditiously, upon receiving a sufficiently substantiated notice, to disable access to the notified works or other subject matter or to remove those works or other subject matter from their websites. Where the average number of monthly unique visitors of such service providers exceeds 5 million, calculated on the basis of the previous calendar year, they shall also demonstrate that they have made best efforts to prevent further uploads of the notified works and other subject matter for which the rightholders have provided relevant and necessary information. - 7 - The cooperation between online content-sharing service providers and rightholders shall not result in the prevention of the availability of works or other subject matter uploaded by users, which do not infringe copyright and related rights, including where such works or other subject matter are covered by an exception or limitation. Member States shall ensure that users in each Member State are able to rely on any of the following existing exceptions or limitations when uploading and making available content generated by users on online content-sharing services: (a) quotation, criticism, review; (b) use for the purpose of caricature, parody or pastiche. - 8 - The application of the provisions in this article shall not lead to any general monitoring obligation. Member States shall provide that online content sharing service providers shall provide rightholders, at their request, with adequate information on the functioning of their practices with regard to the cooperation referred to in paragraph 4 and, where licensing agreements are concluded between service providers and rightholders, information on the use of content covered by the agreements. - 9 - Member States shall provide that online content-sharing service providers put in place an effective and expeditious complaint and redress mechanism that is available to users of their services in the event of disputes over the disabling of access to, or the removal of, works or other subject matter uploaded by them. Where rightholders request to have access to their specific works or other subject matter disabled or those works or other subject matter removed, they shall duly justify the reasons for their requests. Complaints submitted under the mechanism provided for in the first subparagraph shall be processed without undue delay, and decisions to disable access to or remove uploaded content shall be subject to human review. Member States shall also ensure that out-of-court redress mechanisms are available for the settlement of disputes. Such mechanisms shall enable disputes to be settled impartially and shall not deprive the user of the legal protection afforded by national law, without prejudice to the rights of users to have recourse to efficient judicial remedies. In particular, Member States shall ensure that users have access to a court or another relevant judicial authority to assert the use of an exception or limitation to copyright and related rights. This Directive shall in no way affect legitimate uses, such as uses under exceptions or limitations provided for in Union law, and shall not lead to any identification of individual users nor to the processing of personal data, except in accordance with Directive 2002/58/EC and Regulation (EU) 2016/679. Online content-sharing service providers shall inform their users in their terms and conditions that they can use works and other subject matter under exceptions or limitations to copyright and related rights provided for in Union law. - 10 - As of …of entry into force of this Directive the Commission, in cooperation with the Member States, shall organise stakeholder dialogues to discuss best practices for cooperation between online content-sharing service providers and rightholders. The Commission shall, in consultation with online content-sharing service providers, rightholders, users' organisations and other relevant stakeholders, and taking into account the results of the stakeholder dialogues, issue guidance on the application of this Article, in particular regarding the cooperation referred to in paragraph 4. When discussing best practices, special account shall be taken, among other things, of the need to balance fundamental rights and of the use of exceptions and limitations. For the purpose of the stakeholder dialogues, users' organisations shall have access to adequate information from online content-sharing service providers on the functioning of their practices with regard to paragraph 4. 'Article 17 Article 17.1: 'Every success eventually becomes a failure. '''Article 17.2: '''All fan fiction will eventually devolve back to its roots of pornographic literature. '''Article 17.3: '''Fan fiction finds its origins in pornographic literature. '''Article 17.4: '''There is no good fan fiction. 'Article 18 Article 18.1: 'Your car ''will ''burn overnight eventually. '''Article 18.2: '''It's not a curse but a fact. 'Article 19 Article 19.1: 'If it exists, someone will debunk it. 'Article 20 Article 20.1: '''It is impossible for major historical events to happen in the 21st century. '''Article 20.2: '''Every spark of major change eventually fades away. '''Article 20.3: '''Nothing may trigger a major change in today's society. '''Article 20.4: '''The 21st century is boring. '''Article 20.5: '''Revolutions may not happen. '''Article 20.6: '''Mass movements do not work. '''Article 20.7: The world is frozen in a permanent state of being on the brink of nuclear war. Article 20.8: 'Even though nuclear war will never start (see Article 20.1). '''Article 20.9: '''The Area 51 storming will fail. This is a constant. 'Article 21 Article 21.1: 'If you don't have pictures, it didn't happen. '''Article 21.2: '''If you do have pictures, it probably still didn't happen. '''Article 21.3: '''Proof of paranormal evidence is not legitimate unless filmed with a shaky 240p 10FPS camera. Even then, it's still probably illegitimate. 'Article 22 Article 22.1: 'There is no such thing as original content, but we try to protect it anyway. (See Article 13.) 'Article 23 Article 23.1: 'If it's related to FNaF in any way, shape or form, it's cringy. 'Article 24 Article 24.1: 'The FBI knows everything about you. '''Article 24.2: '''Facebook knows everything about you. '''Article 24.3: '''The CIA knows everything about you. '''Article 24.4: '''The NSA knows everything about you. '''Article 24.5: '''The American president knows everything about you. '''Article 24.6: '''Putin knows everything about you. '''Article 24.7: '''Each Internet user has an FBI agent tasked with watching over them, and them ''only, 24 hours a day and 7 days a week. '''Article 25 Article 25.1: 'Ex-Minecraft YouTubers will inevitably go back to their roots. 'Article 26 Article 26.1: 'Theodore Roosevelt is manlier than you. 'Article 27 Article 27.1: 'No matter what you do, ''It will come back. '''Article 28 Article 28.1: '''There is a party on the evening of the 28th of every month. '''Article 28.2:''' The location of this party may not be given. '''Article 28.3: '''No one knows where the party is. '''Article 28.4: ''ANY USER WHO KNOWS THE LOCATION OF THE PARTY IS INVITED TO COME TO THE INTERNET LAW OFFICE FOR '''MEMORY REPLACEMENT '''A REWARD.'' 'Article 29' Article 29.1: 'All Internet users are male. '''Article 29.2: '''All Internet users are in their thirties. '''Article 29.3: '''There is no such thing as a female Internet user. '''Article 29.4: '''There is no such thing as a female gamer. '''Article 29.5: '''There is no such thing as a female. '''Article 29.6: '''There is no such thing. '''Article 29.7: '''Every English-speaking Internet user is an average Caucasian male. '''Article 29.8: '''There is no such thing as a white Spanish speaker. '''Article 29.9: '''baguette 'Article 30 Article 30.1: 'There is no such thing as a native English speaker who can pull off a convincing French accent. '''Article 30.2: '''This also applies to celebrities. '''Article 30.3: '''This also applies to YouTubers. '''Article 30.4: '''I'm looking at you, Mark. 'Article 31 Article 31.1: 'Mark Fischbach is short. 'Article 32 Article 32.1: 'Add your signature to the bottom of this page if you added any articles or subarticles. 'Article 34 Article 34.1: If something exists in the physical world or beyond, Internet users have made pornographic content based on it. Article 34.2: '''If something exists in the physical world or beyond, and no pornographic content based on it exists on the Internet, it will be made eventually. '''Article 34.3: '''If something exists in the physical world or beyond, no matter how disgusting, someone masturbates while thinking about it. '''Article 36 Article 36.1: 'It is strictly forbidden not to reply "aw man" to "creeper". '''Article 36.2: '''That meme is cringe and it should die. '''Article 36.3: '''That's your opinion, Math Man. 'Article 37 Article 37.1: 'No matter how utterly traumatizing what you just saw was, there is worse. '''Article 37.2: '''The more beautiful and pure something is, the more satisfying it is to corrupt it. 'Article 39 Article 39.1: 'All-lowercase is casual-speak, "correct" writing is serious talk, and full-uppercase is shouting. 'Article 44 Article 44.1: 'If something exists in the physical world or beyond that can be explained in human terms, there is a wiki dedicated to it. '''Article 44.2: '''If it cannot be explained in human terms, there still is a wiki dedicated to it. 'Article 45 Article 45.1: 'Someone will eventually break the chain. '''Article 45.2: '''Every joke has a set of people who will not understand it. '''Article 45.3: '''Every joke has a set of people who will treat it as an incorrect fact or a mark of stupidity. 'Article 46 Article 46.1: 'The Internet is SERIOUS FUCKING BUSINESS. 'Article 47 Article 47.1: '''Old people do not understand the Internet. '''Article 47.2: '''Old people do not understand technology. '''Article 47.3: '''Old people do not understand memes. '''Article 47.4: '''Old people do not understand. '''Article 47.5: Old people do not 'Article 48' Article 48.1: '''The pool is always closed. '''Article 48.2: Due to AIDS (and stingrays, which also have AIDS). 'Article 49' Article 49.1: 'If the calculator says so, it is true. '''Article 49.2: '''Unless it's the broken Windows calculator. '''Article 49.3: '''You cannot divide by zero. 'Article 50 Article 50.1: 'A crossover between two fictional works, no matter how absurd or improbable, will eventually be made, often in fan fiction. '''Article 50.2: '''If something exists in the physical world or beyond, Internet users have found or will find a way to make it collide with My Little Pony. 'Article 51 Article 51.1: You shouldn't take the Internet too seriously. 'Article 52' Article 52.1: It is delicious cake. You must eat it. 'Article 53' Article 53.1: It is delicious trap. You must hit it. 'Article 55' Article 55.1: If you have time to make up new rules, you have no life. Article 55.2: Except for me. Article 55.3: If you have no life, you do not exist. Therefore, your rule does not exist if you do not exist. Article 55.4: The rules were created by people who do not exist, so the rules do not exist. Article 55.5: Although the rules do not exist, logic exists. The rules = logic. Therefore the rules do exist. Article 55.6: Since the rules exist by logic, then the rules have always existed. Article 55.7: If Article 55.1 applies to you, then /b/ welcomes you. 'Article 56' Article 56.1: If you're annoyed by the fact that the articles keep skipping numbers, you're gay and a virgin. 'Article 57' Article 57.1: You will never have sex. Article 57.2: '''Everyone on the Internet is a virgin, ''especially ''if they're gay. '''Article 57.3: I just had sex and it felt so good. (see Article 82.1.) 'Article 60' Article 60.1: 'Everyone must know the definitions of all Internet acronyms (LOL, ROFL, LMAO, LMFAO, OMG, OMFG, WTF, WTH, TL;DR, INB4, MFW, TFW, AFAIK, IIRC, BS, etc.) 'Article 61 Article 61.1: It needs more pumpkin. No exceptions. Article 61.2: What pumpkin? 'Article 62' Article 62.1: It has been cracked and pirated. No exceptions. 'Article 63' Article 63.1: 'If a character, fictional or historical, exists, a genderbent version exists too. 'Article 64 Article 64.1: 'If it exists, there is an AU of it. '''Article 64.2: '''Don't you dare ask what an AU is. Report to Article 60.1. 'Article 66 Article 66.1: '''Everything has a fandom. '''Article 66.2: '''Everything. '''Article 66.3: Absolutely everything. Article 66.4: 'That includes everything. '''Article 66.5: '''That includes whatever twisted thing you're thinking about right now, weirdo. '''Article 66.6: '''Even the devil. 'Article 67 Article 67.1: '90% of fan fiction is the stuff of nightmares. '''Article 67.2: '''The remaining 10% is just bad. 'Article 69 Article 69.1: 'Everyone knows what 69 means. 'Article 72 Article 72.1: 'If something is said to be secret, then it is secret. Even if it was leaked to two hundred million people by some dumbass. 'Article 81 Article 81.1: 'No one says ''xD anymore. '''Article 82 Article 82.1: Nobody tells the truth on the Internet. 'Article 84' Article 84.1: All articles ARE true, including this one. 'Article 87' Article 87.1: If you get pepperoni ever again, I swear I'll blow this joint sky-high! Article 87.2: But you know I only like pepperoni! Article 87.3: Cheese pizza is the best pizza. No exceptions. Article 87.4: Sorry, all I got were shrooms, but we can still get high right? 'Article 96' Article 96.1: 'Do not underestimate the Internet. This is serious business. 'Article 100 Article 100.1: Gay will not be tolerated.